Ancient Memories
by Rinoaebastel
Summary: Insecurity rears its head when surprises are in the making.


****Fandom: Once Upon a time.****

****Pairing: Rumplestiltskin/Belle****

**Disclaimer: Characters are not mine.**

**Sumary: Insecurity rears its head when surprises are in the making.**

**NA:/ Next Shortfic. of ****Missing moments and quotidian things**** series. It's a sequel of Rippedhearts; Wells, hugs and encounters; Falling in the shower****;****** Easiest Target; A****** Toasty incident; Rinse Wash and Repeat; Plagues of Storybrooke; Because of a Coat; Scents and Colours.**

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><p><span><strong>Ancient Memories<strong>

_A young woman with coppery hair walked between the shelves containing a massive amount of books; more books than she'd ever seen in one place. The dark castle could be sinister, but it contained hundreds of curiosities that she wanted to discover. _

_But this room was the most wonderful one that the Dark One could have shown her._

_She closed her eyes and spun around, her blue dress twirling with her. A smile was glued to her face and the familiar smell of old paper was like a delicious sweet. But that wasn't the only reason the smile was there. Rumpelstiltskin's actions were a bigger reason than the environment she was in. _

_Since he'd spared Robin Hood, she couldn't help but smile more when in his presence. The more time they spent together, the more they were growing to enjoy each other's company. The fact he was "ignoring" many of his "evil deals," as he called them, was a sign that he was becoming comfortable with her._

_She'd even begun to receive little gestures from him. A hand on the shoulder, a brush against her arms, a chaste kiss on the back of her hand. All these made her legs feel like gelatin and her stomach jump as if she was falling from a high cliff._

_Belle stopped her dance, moved to the books, and started reading the words on the spines. Rumpelstiltskin had given her a room, saved her, and gave her a huge library to entertain herself. She wanted to do something to show him her appreciation._

_She knew Rumpelstiltskin had many things, could have all he wished, but she still wanted to do something for him. Her heart was shouting for it and she didn't want to ignore it._

_She searched through several of the books on the shelf, looking for something that might give her an idea. Books had always been mentors for her, and she was confident they wouldn't disappoint her when she needed them. _

_If she had to spend weeks looking for something, she would. Watching him happy and playful was priceless to her._

_Just when she was about to move to another shelf, a book with gold letters caught her attention. She stopped her search and took the book to take a quick look at its contents._

_When she finished, a smile crossed her face and her eyes turned serious with the challenge the text presented. She'd never knitted before, but it was the type of gift she searched for. Something she made that he could take with him whenever and wherever he wished. It would be something special, and hopefully, something he'd appreciate._

_The good thing about being in Rumpelstiltskin's castle forever was that she had all the time in the world to learn and make the gift perfect._

_She tucked the book under her arm like a treasure, and paid special care to make sure Rumpelstiltskin didn't try to scare her as she crept to her chambers. When she got there she'd hide the text under her pillow, and when her duties ended she'd read everything before making her surprise for him._

_/-/-/-/-/_

_Months passed and the snow had melted under the spring's sun. Belle studied every night on how to create a scarf. She was growing proud of her work because with each passing day she made a stitch more skilled than the other._

_It was possible she wouldn't have the scarf ready before the cold season vanished but it didn't matter. She was sure that despite all, Rumpelstiltskin would be pleased with the present. _

_She smiled to herself and tried not to spill the tea that she had in between her hands. She wanted to continue with her project and in a few hours, when the sun went down, she could continue weaving without Rumple suspecting a thing._

"_Are you Okay, Belle?" interrupted the Dark One. "You've been more distracted than usual. I didn't think that was possible considering all the books around you, but I see I was wrong._

"_I-I'm fine. I only-I'm just thinking about things." She felt the warmth flooding her face and tried to calm her nerves by focusing on filling the cups._

"_Very well. It certainly wouldn't be good if you fell sick." Rumpelstiltskin rose from his seat and walked toward her with steady steps until he invaded her personal space. Surely, with the objective to examine her._

"_Ru-Rumpel?" Her voice choked when the imp took a strand of hair with his claws in a gentle gesture._

_Belle took a deep breath, trying not to tremble or sigh. She pushed down the desire to take a step towards him and snuggle into his body._

"_You're not getting a cold, are you?" he asked as he examined both sides of her face._

"_I'm ... I'm fine," she said. "It's just that I found an interesting book and you know I can't stop thinking about what will happen until I finish."_

_Rumpelstiltskin stopped his inspection and with a strange insecurity, he released her lock of hair and put his thumb on her slightly blushing cheek._

"_Are you sure?" He watched her intensely, as if he was trying to figure out what was going through her head. Belle could only nod. "Well, still don't take risks. The last time you caught a cold you didn't have a good time of it, and I didn't enjoy how dusty it got." He said in his typical nonchalant voice. He pulled away from her quickly. "Drink your tea and go to bed."_

"_But Rumpels—"_

"_Ah," he cut in as he lifted a finger. "I don't want to see you until tomorrow, and I hope that you get a good night's sleep. In fact, stay in bed tomorrow." _

_She pursed her lips in disagreement. She didn't want to default on her obligations, and she didn't want to miss any time she could spend with him. But he wasn't going to change his mind if he thought her health was compromised._

_Sometimes he worried too much._

_Belle shook her head in resignation and dropped herself into one of the chairs next to Rumpelstiltskin. She crossed her arms as a resignation and furrowed her brow when he sat beside her. As expected, he wore a proud and innocent smile, but his eyes were restless and somewhat surprised._

_Belle focused on her cup and relaxed her shoulders._

"_You know I'm not sick."_

_He glanced at her but didn't respond to her words. He wouldn't elaborate and risk displaying his worry even further. _

_Rumpelstiltskin touched the cup with his nails, a gesture of concern that she had come to discover._

"_You did a lot today. You deserve a break," he replied while keeping his eyes on his cup. "I'm sure that after you finish your book tomorrow you're going to torture me all the next day telling me about it."_

_Belle let the surprise invade her face. Did he really think she was sick? Normally, he didn't really put that much emphasis on giving her a break. She kept her eyes from widening as a small panic shot through her. What if he knew what she was making him? No, that wasn't likely. After all, he usually spent most of his time locked in the tower tending to his clients or spinning. _

_She would look on the bright side of the time he'd given her off and try not to dwell on why he was doing it. This would give her time to progress on the scarf and reassure herself that she would finish it on time. _

_She'd need to make sure to read a book so she could nag him about it as well. . . _

_/ -/-/- /_

_The ancestral imp entered his mansion, dragging his feet as he walked and leaving stains on the carpet. He was defeated and he hadn't even battled an enemy with magic. Just an old nobleman, who happened to be the dammed father of his beloved Belle._

_He stopped at the pedestal and his trembling body dared to look at the small, chipped cup that sat upon it. The pang that pierced his chest was still as intense as it was a few hours before. No matter what he did, it wasn't going to leave. _

_He raised his arms and opened his claws to surround the porcelain without touching it. He didn't dare. He didn't want to sully the memories behind it because it was all that remained of her. All he had so he'd feel her presence in his miserable hell._

_His throat burned and water accumulated in his eyes. Rumpelstiltskin clenched his jaw and tried to control his feelings. He failed and the moisture leaked down his cheeks in tiny rivers. _

_He was never going to see her again, and he couldn't change it. Magic could do many things but it couldn't resurrect people. He looked away from the cup and dropped his arms._

_If any of the gods took pity on him, maybe someday he would get his son back. _

_Days would be slow and tortuous without her, but he'd always retain her memory and would return to those days when he began to lose hope. He'd keep her room the same as it was when she left. That would be her memorial along with the cup. The constant reminder to never again make the same mistake that he made with her. His journey towards the room that he had not dared to enter until now. He opened the door with his sweaty hands._

_It wasn't until the fragrance contained in the chambers hit him that he stepped further into the room, feeling as if he was walking into a cave of treasures. _

_He stopped at the edge of the bed, took a deep breath and his body trembled. Maybe if he focused, he could even imagine her at his side, feel her touch on his skin, see her face smiling, and hear her laughter echoing in his ears._

_He poked the used sheets and slid his hand to hide it under the pillow. There was something underneath, a soft material brushed his fingers and made him open his eyes. Belle wasn't a kind of person who used to hide things._

_With a rare movement, he caught the fabric in his hands and slowly dragged it out of its prison. To his surprise, he found a piece of a half finished scarf. The stitches were irregular at first, but gradually became perfect. _

_He stroked the fabric with care and studied the threads that she had left to knit._

_Was this the reason she had been so distracted in the past month? She had been trying to make a simple scarf? But why? Why put so much time into making this when he could easily get her one. Even make her one by hand if that is what she wanted. _

_She had everything she'd need; he had made sure of that. The only thing that he failed to give her was his heart._

_He sat down on the edge of the bed and put the cloth over his legs. With a flick of his hand, he conjured a couple of needles and began to tangle them in the lose thread. He could at least try to finish the scarf because if she had put so much effort into something, it must have been of great importance to her._

_His hands paralyzed when he started the first stitch. His body trembled and his breath hitched. He looked at the half-finished scarf and began to disentangle the needle. When he finished, he looked at the fabric, shook his head, ashamed of himself, and put the scarf back where he found it. _

_He couldn't do it._

_He couldn't finish what she had started with affection, because he would destroy it as he had done with her. _

/ -/-/- /

Belle's eyes moved across the page of one of the new books Rumpelstiltskin had brought her. It was so absorbing that she couldn't stop reading it. It was about a couple of soldiers who hid their love because they wanted to change the world for the better. That author kept her heart in her throat with every word. She wanted to morn in some scenes. In others, she wanted to jump in joy and others she wanted to throw the author to the ogres. When she ended this book, she would have to ask Rumpel to find more of this M.S. Dutchess.

She continued reading until she reached the last line of the chapter and growled in frustration when she read how idiotic they were being. They had to keep their distance just because that bloody tyrant separated them. She left the book on the table, muttered a few words, and crossed her arms. She wanted to absorb what she had read and understand what the hell was going on between those two. The idiocy in them was high.

She shouldn't really complain because something similar had happened to her and Rumpel. They weren't in the same situation, but they shared a similar stupidity and they were separated by the wiles of someone evil.

She put a hand on her forehead and tried to calm down. With a couple of puffs, she regained control over her emotions and got up from the couch. She needed to tidy it since it became disheveled as she read and shifted with each type of scene.

She took off the cushions and straightened each of them. When she lifted the last one, what she found underneath left her speechless. She smiled and picked up the item.

**-/-/ - **

Belle muttered under her breath as she undid another stitch gone wrong. She'd lost practice after all these years. "Belle?" She jumped and hid the scarf behind her back when Rumple entered the room. "You okay?"

"Ye-yes of course," she answered with haste but tried to act as her normal self. He almost caught her and she couldn't afford that. Not after all the time she dedicated to it, but it was a normal risk of sharing a room with your true love.

She watched how Rumple raised an eyebrow at her voice. She gave him a tender smile, hoping that it would help him relax.

"The last time you said that, you caught a cold in the Dark Castle." He smiled and walked towards the bed. She felt nervous as he approached and tried to hide more and more the scarf under the pillow without him noticing her movements. It was hard. He was an astute man with more living years that anyone in the world. "Also, it's strange for you to be in bed at this hour."

"Well I was just...I just wanted to read in a comfortable place. The last time I read one book I almost killed the sofa." She managed to say as she took the book off the nightstand and opened it. She felt Rumple's odd stare on her. He wasn't going to buy it. Not when she had the book miles away from her.

"Well, then I will leave you to it," he said with a sad voice, making her feel a horrible sharp sensation inside her heart. She could just stop hiding the scarf and ask for his help, but that would ruin the surprise. It was almost finished. She'd have to hold out until then.

She took a deep breath when she saw Rumple was going to leave the room without speaking another word to her. He was probably going to blame himself for something he didn't do, so she couldn't let him leave thinking he'd done something wrong.

"Rumple," she called with a soft voice. He turned to look at her, his eyes still carrying some angst and worry within them. She felt guilty. She wanted to give him a surprise, yet she was hurting him as she tried to do so.

"Yes?"

"Do you think we can go have a dinner sometime? I think Ruby called them dates." His eyes became warmer when he looked at her with a smile full of joy.

"Of course."

/-/-/

Rumple finished tying his tie just as Belle walked out of the bathroom in one of the new dresses he'd gotten her. She was dazzling in it, but in his eyes, she was beautiful no matter what she wore. Belle approached him as he slipped on his jacket and moved to adjust his tie. She smiled at him. She looked more herself than she had this morning when she was feigning reading on their bed. He wasn't stupid; he knew that she was up to something.

He was worried that maybe she grew tired of his company and their complicated love. He feared she was planning to leave, and the only way he'd see her again would be quick glances on the street.

"You're going to be cold in that thin suit," she said as she wrapped her arms around his waist.

He looked at her oddly. Surely, she knew he'd wear a coat over his suit.

"I'm not the one that will be cold. You wear little clothing for this time of the year," he said and motioned to the thin dress she wore.

"I will wear a coat," she replied casually and then grinned. "And if I'm cold, I'll have an excuse to hug you in front of everyone. Don't you think it's a nice idea?"

Rumpelstiltskin laughed and kissed her forehead. "You don't need an excuse." At least he hoped she didn't need it. He wanted the real feeling. After her odd behavior, he could only fear that he was seeing what he wanted to see rather than what was there. It was in his nature. He was a coward, and his loved ones always ended up abandoning him.

"But the rest of the world needs one. It's our first dinner out, and I don't want you to feel uncomfortable. If you appear nervous they won't see you as your real self."

Rumpelstiltskin laughed sarcastically and took her hand. "Nothing I do will be normal for them. But while you're good, I'll be too." He lifted her hand to his lips and kissed it.

"Well, too bad for them."

"And better for us." That was what he hoped. Asking for this dinner was a strange request considering the latest events. Maybe this was a way to see if she still loved him. Maybe he still had a chance with her.

When he opened the door to exit the house, the cold collided with them. Belle stopped and released his hand. His pulse started to race. This was the moment she'd tell him she couldn't stay with him anymore. That she only gave him the opportunity to have dinner with her because she pitied him.

"Are you okay?" She nodded and he relaxed when she smiled.

"I'll be right back. You can wait for me outside if you want. I'm going to go get a warmer coat," she said without hesitation or any sort of weakness in her voice.

She rushed up the stairs and he went outside. It was cold but they were used to it since it was always cold at the dark castle. A few minutes later, Belle returned to his side. Rumpelstiltskin looked at her and she beamed at him before looking in the distance.

"Do you think it will snow? Like when we were at home?" Her hands were behind her, and she was moving her feet as if she wanted to dance.

"Who knows?" he replied with an enigmatic voice all the while wondering why she appeared so cheery. "Are you ready to go?"

She nodded, but before they started walking, Belle threw her arms tightly around him. She began to circle a bunch of soft, blue fabric around his neck. It was full of little holes, testaments to the skill levels she'd acquired over time. He swallowed hard when he remembered the first time he'd seen what was now circling his neck.

It was the unfinished scarf he'd found under her pillow back in the dark castle. Is this what she was hiding this morning? This was the cause of her weird behavior! It wasn't that she didn't love him anymore.

He pulled away from her and stared down at the blue fabric. He feared recalling the desolation he'd felt with her loss. That she wouldn't really be here. That she would be gone and all he'd be left with was her memory and a scarf. If he lost her again, he'd be useless.

"Now you can't catch a cold. I wanted to give it to you before, but it took me a while to do it."

He closed his eyes. She didn't say how much time she spent on it, but he knew. The hours of lost sleep and of forgetfulness in his castle had been because of this. It was all because of a gift for him.

A gift for a monster. Not a simple human, but an evil imp.

"Why take the time to make this for me?"

"I know this is just a scarf and that you have everything you want, but I wanted to make you something. I hope it might become special to you. I'm sorry if I scared you this morning. It's just. . . I wanted to keep it a secret."

He'd been worrying for no reason. Her secrecy was not because she was growing tired of him, but because she wanted to show he was important to her. And he only doubted because of fears caused by previous experiences.

In one swift motion, he took her in his arms and clasped her body against his. With desperation, one gloved hand tangled in her wavy hair while he rested the other around her waist. He tried to control his emotions and his threatening tears, and wanted to go back inside and never let her go. But going out tonight was a step forward, and both of them had to be strong.

He was the weak one, he had always been, but he would try his best to become strong for her. For them. He had to because their love was real. Her dedication showed that she would never let him hide. That she would never abandon him. And now he could only think of two words that could express the way he felt about the gift, and about her dedication.

"Thank you."

End

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><p><strong>Well hope you dears liked it and if you have time, let me know it :)<strong>


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